Pros and Cons of Life in a Whirlwind.

The word to describe my life for the last six months to a year is Whirlwind. I feel as if I am standing in the middle of one everyday. With things to do, places to be, Husband to love, kids to take care of, chores, bills to pay, callings to fullfill, errands to run, fighting children to deal with, friends to hang out with, fun things to do, illnesses to deal with, movies to watch, books to read, and many other things. Everyday I am to be here or there, do this or that, remember this and that. Every two hours I usually have some place to be or someone to pick up. So are the pros and cons of life in a whirlwind.

Consequently I have become a jumpy person. Nervous and tired. Not quite myself. Late to almost everything. How do other Moms cope? The other day my kids ran downstairs to play, and I was grateful for the break. Not 30 seconds after they got downstairs they came running back up the stairs screaming bloody murder. "MOM, MOM, MOM x3!!!" My heart began to pound and fear and tension took over my muscles. Whatever could be the matter? A giant hairy spider? A dead body? A leaky pipe bursting to flood our basement? A child in danger? A stranger in the house? No, not any of these, fortunately. My children have inherited their Father's great enthusiasm and expression of feeling. They were running up to tell me the Amaryllis had bloomed, and how beautiful it was. Dragging my limp, over adrenalized, body downstairs to look at it, I realized, no wonder I am a nervous anxious mess. You would have thought someone's arm had suddenly fallen off, or something, from the way they were screaming.

You should know that I love plants and especially flowers. I do a lot of gardening and it does make me happy and excited every time a plant thrives and blooms a new bloom. I guess my kids know that. It's cute to see them appreciating some of the same things as me. I really do appreciate all the excitement and joy my children and husband express 24/7, but I have got to find a way to cope with the anxiety it causes me. I am such a mellow calm person, but life in a whirlwind has changed me some.

I have found peace in reading scriptures and ensign, when I find a spare moment, which is hardly ever. I have tried taking a little nap midday, but life rarely permits. I do yoga! Hopefully my mind will rewire and I will get used to life in a whirlwind. Maybe a time miracle will happen if I keep praying for it.

I found relief from the whirlwind yesterday, as I attended the Draper Temple open house. I don't have words great enough to describe how beautiful it was or how good I felt being there with Chris and our Girls. I kept feeling guilty that we didn't invite more people to come with us. I had so many thoughts and peaceful feelings. We had a reserved time for 12. I was thinking, we would get to the chapel, get on the bus, and we'd be in the temple, look at it, and get back in no time. Wrong, we had to sit and wait 1 hour before we got on the bus. The only bad part of the experience, but as I was sitting there I reflected on life before earth.

We must have had similar impatient feelings, anxiety, and anticipation. Joy and happiness, excitement and wonder. How happy we must have felt as we learned our number had been called and it was finally our turn. Relief that the wait was over and something wonderful was about to begin. How our Heavenly Father must have felt sending us off knowing full well whether we would return or not, and that final farewell till we would meet again. I can't imagine sending my child somewhere knowing they would not return to me, and at the same time the joy I would feel knowing they would return.

I also felt the power of the spirit in the temple so strong the minute I walked in. I was having a very hard time choking back the tears as they were trying to escape. Each painting was so beautiful and good. Every corner and cranny was so intricately planned. The chandeliers were so sparkley, like a sparkle and shine I've never seen before. And the Brides room, where future Mom's of little girls will go one day, to help their precious daughters get ready for their greatest covenant ever...a temple marriage. The sealing room where we looked at each other in the eternity mirrors. What a magnificent experience to stand there with your Husband and children and see the future of a family sealed. Moving to the celestial room, the most beautiful and brightest of all. I realized the great worth of living righteously can only be glimpsed upon in this world.

I am so grateful for my whirlwind life and know there is a great reward ahead as I do my best. Try to be happy. And live righteously.

I also have to note that Brooke kept telling us she was starving and that we had forgotten to feed her. Chris and I tried to deal with and distract her for an hour, until at last we watched the video about temples and were directed on how to proceed. In which we were informed there would be cookies at the end. Brooke lit right up, sat up, and smiled saying :"Cookies! After we see the Temple! Okay!" She didn't whine at all after that, and she seemed to have a marvelous time. And yes she was the first to seek out and get her cookie at the end.